28th October 2015

Dear DB

Hey guys. I just wanted to write a 'short' entry since I feel so urg right now. I feel like crying again right now; I feel weak as hell. My dad is getting so pissed about everything I do for no reason. I forgot to give him my letter for this trip where we had to pay and then he got really angry and started assuming things like I always lie to him and that I probably have more things I haven't told him. He is right. On Wednesday or Tuesday I got my Maths results for my paper: 44/50. I got the best out of many people yet I started to break down. Why? Because of my parents. You see my dad is a tutor and he is very clever and he specialises in Maths. He wants me to be the best in the class out of everyone. He always compares me to this girl who is very clever and comes to the tuition. She got like an award for Maths and other things. Mind you, she doesn't go to the same school as me since we both did the 11plus and I got more than her-surprising- and I got the best school. It's so frustrating the fact that I will never make my parents proud. They are always like "Look at her, why can't you be like her?" "Does she only care about friends and having fun?" "She studies by herself withought her parents forcing her but you are so stupid" I am BANNED from my phone because I was talking to my friends and that 'friendships are not important.' My parents think that my friends are 'bad' because they have parties where they all hang out and 'they never care about studying' and that I shouldn't be friends with them. It's shit; my life is shit. My friends had a party on Monday since half term and Halloween is coming up. I told my friend who was begging me to come that I won't be able to come. Yet I didn't say the fact that my parents thought that she was all about having fun and not caring about education. YET she is great in many subjects and she has high levels. They, my parents, even said or thought that Maya (my closest fricking friend) is probably not my friend because she doesn't hang out with people who don't care about education. I didn't say anything because they wouldn't let me. I still remember that say, the day I was going to give up. I was so sure that it was the day. I was going to kill myself in some way and that I should write something to my friends. I had enough. I had enough of everything. My parents made me study for the whole day. Made me go extra tuitions, embarrassed me as well in front of everyone. I couldn't say anything but sit there silently. They took away everything that I cared about. But then something clicked in me; made me stop: my classmates. Every single one of them in my class. I'm sure they would never read this blog and I would never say this to them in front of their faces. It was the last week of Year 7 and we also had our House Drama performance, I couldn't miss that! In my primary school I was bullied heavily. I would cry often and I was weak. The last year was bad but I had gained some friends and I was more confident. Then I was SO HAPPY that none of my classmates were coming to my school. I was going to make a new start in my secondary school. And I did. It was amazing. I love my class till to death even though it may not look like it. I want to be close with everyone and I care about everyone. I want them to read this but I want this to be more personal. Because I wouldn't write openly if I knew that someone who knows me was reading this. But if you know me I want to say Thank You. Gamsahminda.

Till Next Time Bye! Have a great week!

23rd October 2015-HALF TERM!

Dear DB  ^_^
Hey! I got SO MUCH to get through in this blog! So let's start straight away! Half Term started on Thursday so we are having today (Friday) off! So basicallyyyy REMEMBER WHEN I SAID ABOUT THE SARA THING (if you don't then maybe you should read my second blog post ;) )
ASHTON DID IT!!!! It was hilarious!!!!! Let me say what happened, so on Wednesday(I think), the girls were eating in the table in the canteen like normal and then we see Ashton looking at our direction and is stretching like he was gonna do something. At first I HAD NO IDEA what was happening, I thought he was gonna ask out this popular bunch of girls in our year who were sitting like near us on a different table. Then we all finished and were leaving, mind you we had Sara with us. Then we immediately knew what was happening! So this:
 -walking out and Ashton starts following us, tying to get near Sara-
-Sara immediately walks faster-
Ashton: So Sara yeah don't take it weird or anything yeah?
Sara: -what the hell is he gonna do?-
-Everyone is trying to not laugh-
Ashton: I'm not gonna ask you out if you think that!
-Everyone knows that Sara thought he was gonna ask her out-
Sara: No shut up stop! I know it's a dare!
-it's not btw-
Ashton: Did you do something to your hair, it looks nice?!
Sara: -touches hair- Thanks...?
BWAHAHAHHAHAHAHA yeah. Then the lunch time was full of OMG SARA YOUR BOYFRIEND and acting out what she did. YEAH. I think she finally got the hint that she wasn't invited to our squad. Aka her WhatsApp status: 'Things are going downhill'
She lost her best friend who started hating her cause she became a bitch and is SO NICE AND AMAZING!
awww poor her, at least she has the Three Rejects. -_-
SO THE NEXT THING on Friday I had maths last= sitting next to Troye for and hour yey -_-
I had like pen drawn tattoos on my hand and he wanted the same one I had which was an infinity with an anchor. So I taught him how to do it. Then I asked him what I should I draw to post on Insta and let's just say he was SPECIFIC: A skull with a top hat with like tattoos and cool stuff around. I thought it's a sick Idea so I did it!
And I was texting him about what he wanted me to draw:
Me: What did u want me to draw
T:Um A skull with emojis and cool pics around it
Me:Kk, this is what I did so far-send pic-
T: That's sick!
-after bit-
T:what have you done now?
M-pic-I'm paining it
T: Oh sick!
-after bit-
T: Wht have you done now?
M:-pic-
T: That looks sick!
M:  Thx :)
T:K
-after bit-
M: I think i'm done -pic-
T: sick
M: shall I give it to you?
T:Nah it's fine.
M: Kk

SOOOOOOOOOO YEAH. wat a convo.
Let's stop there!! Urg just realised, I would have like nothing to talk about cause no school! But I have something that i'm saving for next time! For now!
BYE/ANNYEYONG/AU REVOIR/AUF WIDERSEHEN /ADIOS
-Ess.Tee
xxxx
Girl Online Going Offline (dat reference though)

20th October 2015-i don't have a title....-_-

Dear DB (or was it BD.....? I DON'T HAVE GOOD MEMORY >.<)

Well I haven't update since Saturday I guess cause busy school life (Yeah sure!)...
But do I have anything that interesting to blog about...? I mean I don't get the point cause no one is actually reading this -_- WHATEVA imam do it anyways! So first thing DRAMA! We got our groups and i'm with Miley, Riley, Sam and Louis. PS these aren't the real names like I said... It's gonna be fun, I can tell. We are doing Cinderella and i'm one of the Ugly Stepsisters (THANK GOD! I don't wanna be Cinderella?) and Riley is the other one. Sam is the Prince and Miley is Cinderella! (Lol!) Then Louis is Buttons. No point of him being Prince cause well...he does have an ACTUAL girlfriend. But it's more like a WhatsApp relationship though...ANYWAYS. We have to make a song by changing the lyrics to a real song and then make a dance for it aswell. Gosh! In other news (it's not the news wat de hell?) er. ER. OH YEAH THE SARA THING. So basically, a girl called Sara probably likes the popular king Ashton. SOOO to find out if she does. We asked Ashton if he would flirt with her to see her reaction; he said no... DISSAPOINTING! -_- Oh well!? What other stuff...? Oh Troye gave me some of his KitKat during History lol. And I swear is Lucas trynna talk to me now???? So Lucas WAS my crush for like a year? Since primary cause of this dumb reason... maybe i'll tell one day... So I started liking him cause some 'friends' kept on making me like him. YADADAA Then in my secondary school he also came (great -_-) I was so happy! CAUSE I LIKED HIM! urg it feels weird to say that... So I would want him to like me but I still kept it low. BUT he found out cause people from primary told him. 0///-///0  THEN I STOPPED LIING HIM OKAY? Then this year I didn't end up with him in any of my lessons like last year in Art. So I don't speak to him GOOD. Then all of the sudden at the end of the day when me and my friends were talking outside. He comes up and asks, "Are any of you in set 3 in ICT?" OK AND THERE WERE OTHER PEOPLE THERE SO WHY NOT AS THEM?!?! bish whet. I hate him. he hates me. life is a circle of perfection. amazing.

LET'S STOP THERE!

SO TILL NEXT TIME! BYEEEEE
-EssTee

17th October 2015-So Hey!

Dear DB( Diary Blog )
^^I'm clever I know -_-

Anyways! So Hey! I guess this is the first part of my blog-diary thing. Soo what should I start with...?
Ok maybe I should just talk about what has been happening in my life! Hmm so where do I start...?
Should I just talk about the first tard in my mind right now -_- Troye. Well, Troye is not his real name; it's way far from his actual name to be honest. But I chose to call him Troye cause for some stupid reason, he reminds me of Troye Sivan?! And seriously, Troye Sivan is BAEEEEE He's amazing! <3 So something I should say, I'm a MASSIVE fangirl. Like off YouTube, Youtubers, 5 Seconds of Summer, All Time Low, KPOP: EXO, BTS Girls Generation, Red Velvet (no one probably knows these people BUT THEY ARE AMAZING!) also KDrama. Oh and FIFA and GTA and Minecraft but I don't play them, I just watch it. Oh and Disney, DISNEY IS LIFE LIKE LEGIT. Don't even get me started on Disney shows: Liv and Maddie, Jessie, Austin and Ally and OMG GIRL MEETS WORLD <3 <3
ok i'm done
BACK TO TROYE. I have to sit next to him in SO MUCH LESSONS, it's mad. And I just somehow end up with that idiot. During Maths we made a plan for Sam to ask out Sharpay since they flirt SO OFTEN; it's annoying. Yeah imma be ok if you both are together and flirt BUTTTT (hehe butt) they aren't together and they still flirt and they say they don't like eachother like srsly mate wot? Then Troye was gonna try make Sam ask out Sharpay but guess what, that didn't work, sadly :(
Ahhhh we'll just have to see what happens in this world or even my world.? I  think I may update often...? Tomorrow is a busy day! I have Dance where I have to perform 0_0!!!!!! I'm so scared like jeez. Then I have homework, fun /-_-/
So as you can see, I won't be using REAL names of my friends or whatever but yeah! I guess sometimes their fake names make sense cause they remind me of then like Sharpay reminds me of 'Sharpay' in High School Musical. I haven't watched all of the HSM films but still reminds me of her.
For now: BYE/ANNEYONG/AUF WIDERSEHEN/SALUT
-Ess.Tee